Monday, July 27, 2009

Working Mom

I recently read a blog posting where a mother wrote a letter to her daughter stating that for three months her daughter's life had consumed her.  And for those three months she had kept a secret from her daughter - the fact that she was a working mom.  She then went on to explain that she would be gone 8hrs a day and when home would even be occasionally distracted by a little square contraption - known as a blackberry.  She was happy to go back to work and hoped that some day her daughter would respect her for being a working mother with a career.

Well, my Squishette, I too am going to be a working mother.  Unfortunately, unlike the blog I read, I am not at all happy or upbeat about it.  To be honest I have cried about it every change I have gotten since you were born.  Why?  Well...if you think Mommy is a wuss just wait until you have your own little baby and we'll see how you feel too.  For the last 6 months I have been in denial - and finally the time has come.  I am starting work very soon.  And you will be going to daycare.  Luckily we are blessed because I will be working part you are still stuck with me 3 days a week.  Ha.

Anyway - going back to work, or facing the prospect of doing so, has made me reflect on many things.  One of those things has been my relationship with Abuelala.  Looking back I have realized that Abuelala and I are very close...perhaps the reason we are close has to do with the fact that Abuelala always made an effort to sit us down and dissect our days when she got home from work.  I have distinct memories of sitting in her bathroom in the morning when she got ready for work and sitting in her bedroom when she came home and changed at night.  In fact we made a game out of it - and still do to this day - by starting each conversation with "I got on the bus..."  Hopefully by the time you can read this those words will make you smile because you will be familiar with the same tradition.

Bottom line?  I love you.  I would love nothing more than to stay home and be your full time playmate, caretaker, teacher, and official squisher.  But I must go to work so that you can grow up strong and healthy with a roof over your head and food on the table.  I hope you will understand.  That being said - I PROMISE that when I am home I will be with you...and I expect you to give me the dirt on your day starting from the very beginning when you got on the bus...


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